So as you can already see the name of my blog has changed as now my life has changed. I am a working mom (officially came back to work today...Insert tears here!).
I never saw myself as being a working mom. I always thought that I would be able to be at home with my children from the day that they were born until I finally decided to go to work while they were in school. I thought I would be the parent that would be with her baby all day everyday, that I would be there for him to play with and nurse from all day, that I would be the one caring for my child and not someone else. I always thought that I would be that parent that was able to be the volunteer everyday at their school, have a snack ready when they got home.
Well life has changed this. I didn't marry a doctor or lawyer or even that prince that I always imagined myself doing as a kid. Instead I married a man that works as a retail manager, has to open the store someday and close others, that has to work every other weekend, and that comes home smelling like a hardware store. But you know what...I would trade him for anything! I love him more then I could ever imagine, and it keeps growing everyday. But because I wasn't meant for a rich prince or even someone that made closer to 3 figures a year, I am back at work. Please don't miss judge me here, I don't blame Dustin for this, I just sometimes wish that either life was less expensive, or he made more money at a job he liked better, or that life was all rainbows and sunshine and that money didn't exist...I think we all wished or the Utopia world, but in my opinion, we make our own Utopia.
So leaving this morning was so hard. And each day this week is going to get harder I think. Today was great because Dustin is off of work today and is home with Logan (officially 8 weeks old today). I got an update from Dustin saying that Logan had a bottle of pumped Mommy Milk around 8:30am and had about 4.5ounces. OH MY GOODNESS, he is getting BIG! I remember when he would just have 2 ounces when we went on our first date after he turned a month old. Then just a couple weekends ago he would have about 3 ounces in a feeding...now he's to 4.5 ounces. Come on boobs, give me milk, Logan needs to eat!
That is one thing that is making it a little easy for me here at work; we have mommy rooms so I can go and pump and not worry about someone walking into a conference room or something of that nature. There is a big comfy chair, a nice table in front of me for the pump, a little clock, and a sink with all the supplies I need for cleaning afterwards...plus the kitchen has the fridge. My only thing is...I take longer then 15 minutes to get ready, pump, clean up, get myself back into 'shape', go to the bathroom, have a snack, and then get back to work. I had my snack at the desk and still took close to a half an hour...hopefully it gets faster.
As to work itself...well, I'm not sure yet. I should let you know that I really am evaluating this closely today just because I have an interview on Wednesday afternoon at another company. Though, my eyes are very obviously tinted because I've been off for so long, and it is just my first day back.
See, I’ve had issues where I work in the past, not with the company, but instead with a co-worker, and only the one. She frightened me a bit when I first started. She just came on a bit strong. By this I mean she told her husband, yes he works here too, that she and I were the best of friends, and this was only about 2 or 3 days after I started working here. The thing is, it didn’t seem like she was joking, but serious! That is what really frightened me.
After that I sharted seeing a different side to Mrs. Co-Worker, a side that makes her seem fake and acting at all times, and one that needs attention. The thing that really got me right before I left on maternity leave was when our manager came to me and told me what Mrs. Co-Worker said "Hope hates me!" I felt like I was in 1st grade...no sorry, I have a nephew in first grade that wouldn't even do something that childish...I felt like I was in pre-school. I just saw it as something that was really immature and not something that any manager should have to go to an employee about and no employee should ever go to a manager and say.
Don’t get me wrong, I don’t hate her by any means. I don’t have that kind of time, energy or even the desire to think of Mrs. Co-Worker so much as to ‘hate her’. I just wish that things could be different, that’s all.
Other then Mrs. Co-Worker, I really do like my job, though I do want to move up or else move soon. I am great friends with several co-workers and even some that have moved on that I still keep in touch with via email.
Being back though, it is nice being somewhere where I know most of the people walking by, and to know what to do and how to do it. Also it's great just to know my surroundings. If I get this job at the other company I'll be about 15 minutes or more further from home, I'll have to learn everything new, and who's to say I'm going to like it. But it does allow for more movement in the company then where I am now. I guess we'll just have to see. I'll find out on Friday if I'm offered the job. Yep, that's right they are going to tell everyone (they are hiring 17 people for a call center) by Friday. At least I don't have long to wait!
Well that's it for now. I'm going to try and be much better about getting on here and posting now too...PROMISE! But like I said, life gets hectic! As to the New Goal...My goal is to actually post now, and to post about life as a working mom, as the blog name suggests. I am also hoping to reach more readers, to get opinions and feed back on life in general. Maybe this can even be the start of a mommy blog group here and some great friendships. Yes, I said that. We all need support, and I hope to give and maybe even recieve some.
Until tomorrow, have a great day, and remember to kiss your babe's, tell them you love them. Then thank your partner for such a wonderful child and for all that they do, and hopfully they will do the same to you!
Disclaimer: All views are those of mine alone and not those of the company in which I work. I intentionally keep the name of my company hidden on this blog as to not reflect negatively on them. All names of those in which I work with are kept hidden as well as to not hinder their character later in life. These are my views and my views and feelings alone and not those of others.
I use this blog not as that to advance me in life but instead as that to stay connected with friends and family near and far, please remember this while reading my blog. This is because the life of being a working mother keeps me busy to the point of being disconnected with those that I love and usually socialize with.
This Blog is not ment for the purpose of work, but for that of a personal journal of events that I share about mine, my husbands, and my son’s life with those that we love and of course those that invite us into their lives through their blog and want to be apart of ours in our blog. Parts of those events are work events. My own vents are not here in order for others to see and use to judge those that are vented about, be them people that either I or my husband work with, family, or friends.
Please remember that I am a new mother and with that comes stress over and above the stress of normal everyday life. If you have not been a new mother (or father) then these stresses are ones that you don’t understand. This is a way for me to control that stress and not have it come out side ways at those it is intended for or not intended for.
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